I can't appropriately express with words what it was like to watch my deaf child hear for the first time after her cochlear implant surgery. I can't tell you what it felt like when my son with ADHD achieved daily tasks the first day he was put on ADHD medicine. Both were significant days in my life as a mother and their lives as human beings.
With all the hustle and bustle that happened after both of those events, with all the highs and hype with watching such miraculous occasions, I don't know if I am good at stopping to appreciate the small wins. I doubt I am really slowing down and soaking in the beauty of an A in a complex Literature class when my son, Jacob, with ADHD had a difficult time with spelling "red" in 1st grade. I seriously doubt I stop and see the beauty in Lexi having conversations with her friends when at one time I begged God on my hands and knees to hear her say momma before we knew she was deaf.
This past weekend, we had our annual Hear the Music Kids Camp at The Center for Courageous Kids. I was blown away at the gratitude from the children and families tackling hearing loss, speech, devices and more. I felt like I OWED it to them and to God for all we've been given on the grandiose scheme of things.
However, as I watched each and every child, navigating their own journey and all different outcomes, I couldn't help but thank God for the little things. I saw sweet children who naturally cannot hear, dancing and laughing to music. I saw little girls born deaf with cochlear implants whispering and giggling in each other's ears. I saw parents kicked back and relaxing for just one weekend, while the amazing camp counselors cared for their children for most of the weekend. And I thought about $10, $20 & $100 donations we've collected this past year that allowed these families this opportunity to do all of this camp at NO COST.
No, I didn't watch a deaf child hear for the very first time, nor did I see a mountain move. But I did see the power of God in each and every family. I saw HIS AWESOMENESS.
Lately, I've been so tired and exhausted from a series of events we have coming up. It's also the season I coach softball and Lexi's travel ball is ramping up. We are gone A LOT. I haven't seen a quiet Saturday morning in a very long time. And as I pulled into the camp, my blessing, my son, my sweet boy with ADHD, had a moment. He was upset, we were managing some things and I JUST left our mobile clinic serving/working a record weekend. So I was/am TIRED. We have our gala coming up, a mission trip next week and this Kids Camp.
Friday night, I felt a bit paralyzed from tiredness pulling into the camp.
And then I witnessed HIS AWESOMENESS. The awesomeness of all those sweet families who were given a difficult start in life. A child who CANNOT HEAR. Y'all, this is some stuff of biblical proportions. In Bible times and even in Jamaica where we head next week on missions, deafness is shunned.
So to see a gym full of children who were born deaf/hearing impaired....yet they can HEAR! I CANNOT TELL YOU HOW AWESOME GOD IS.
I drove away Sunday, through the hills of Kentucky, feeling overwhelmingly "bless-tired". That's my new phrase. I am bless-tired.
This morning, I had a long talk with my kids about expectations and their behaviors. I reminded them that we all make mistakes. And then I shared with them this moment when God reminded me how AWESOME He is....
For six months after Lexi was finally diagnosed with deafness, I wandered in the wilderness asking, begging God for answers. "What did I do? Am I being punished? Why would you punish me through Lexi?"
Like I shared with the kids... God used that six months to draw me in, draw me closer, let me lean into Him. He didn't give me the answers right away.
And I'll never forget the moment I read John 9.
Jesus was walking with His disciples and they ran into a blind man. They asked Jesus, "What did this man do, or what did HIS PARENTS DO, that he was born blind?"
Jesus put some dirt and spit on his eyes and as He healed the man, He responded, "This man nor His parents did anything wrong. This happened to show the miracle of God in his life."
THEN, Jesus told the man to "go and TELL."
ALL THE AWESOMENESS in the big and small things are to remind us how amazing God is.... life isn't always going to be rainbows and sunshine. Some days, you'll experience the blindness and deafness of life. So take time to SLOW DOWN and see the AWESOMENESS of God in all the small things each day, because those moments will create a humility inside of you to get through each day with GRATITUDE and a good attitude!